Let Me In
by OliviaDuxbury
Summary: Rey has been working hard at shutting Ben out of her mind. But can she stay focused while he persuades her to be let in? Purely an intimate one shot between these characters. My own interpretation of their Force Bond. Rated M.


**Author Note:**

 **This is my first Star Wars fan fiction, so please be kind! This has very little content aside from an intimate relationship between Ben and Rey. I touched on their Force Bond in a way that may be different from what others think. So keep that in mind!**

 **Thank you for reading! Reviews are amazing!**

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I'll never get used to his hands. They're always cold, always smooth and firm like rigid icicles. They trail across my skin and leave goosebumps in their wake. They send shivers down my spine and make my toes curl. It doesn't even have to be during an intimate moment, just whenever I feel his fingers wrap through mine or grab onto a limb, I'm suddenly forty below zero.

"You're quiet," he murmurs into my neck as his fingers run through my hair. Even his breath feels like a cool evening breeze.

I swallow and attempt to compose myself. "I'm concentrating," I answer. His lips leave what feels like frostbite against the pulse point on my neck. He smiles against my skin. I feel the rumble of a laugh in his chest as it presses against mine.

"And how is that going for you?" I suck in a breath of cold air as his hands leave my scalp and cup my breasts. I wriggle beneath him, bunching the pile of blankets beneath us and sinking further into the impossibly soft mattress.

What I'm concentrating on is keeping him from my mind. Our Force Bond has grown strong, but with it has come the lack of privacy. It takes a great deal of focus to keep my internal walls up. Ben has an easier time walling himself off. He remains composed and collected while I fall apart and let him rush in to see my most personal thoughts as soon as I become distracted. Usually I don't mind, since our relationship has surpassed me caring whether or not he sees my deepest desires or random internal monologue, but the less I control it around him, the easier it is to be open wherever I go. And that's a dangerous game.

"Let me in…" he trails off kissing across my collarbone. My shirt stops him from traveling further down my chest, but the butterflies flying in my stomach are beginning to catch a chill, their wings becoming heavy from the ice forming. I can feel the steady throb, the consistent push of him trying to enter my mind. He has told me how much he likes seeing my thoughts when we're together. He likes to _feel_ me while I feel him. And I know what he means. The sensation is unbelievable. But I resist.

My breath hitches as he squeezes my breasts and then runs his hands down to my hips. He lifts my shirt ever so slightly, his fingers tickling my bare skin. "No," I whisper as I push back. I use the Force the best way I can. I see the balance of the world, feel the cold and magnetizing pull of the Dark Side as I do my best to keep him out. It's like an internal tug of war.

"Yes," he growls as he rips my shirt over my head. I'm exposed and I feel the claws of his mind scratching. I clench my teeth as he kisses between my breasts. My willpower is beginning to leave, but I continue to hold on. Even as he sucks on the top of my right breast, the edge of my bra stopping him from seeing my painfully hard nipple and taking advantage. "Please," he practically whimpers as he sits up and looks down at me. He's straddling me. The room is dim, but I can clearly see his tousled hair and the way his lips are pouted. He's begging. I can't resist his begging. It unravels me.

I watch as he takes his shirt off. It's one fluid motion. It's hypnotizing. "I…" I trail off, unsure of what I was even about to say. His upper body leaves me breathless. I can feel myself retreating, his push become more demanding. It's almost like a headache, but with a hint of an itch. My walls are crumbling. I can practically picture his greedy internal hands reaching through the Force Bond and slowly but surely taking down my wall, brick by brick. I almost let him in, I can feel the rush of cold air start to fill my mind, the way it leaves mental icicles around my thoughts. But with one final push, one final pull from the balance of the universe, I snap shut. I seal myself. I can see the physical pain on his face. It feels like a slap in the face. I would know. He's done it to me many times.

He reaches his hand up and tousles his hair. "That's not fair." He smirks as he leans down and kisses me. He parts quickly and sits up again. I try my best to keep my eyes on his, not on the very obvious bulge in his pants. The bulge that sits right over top of my hips, where an ache has erupted. "You've been practicing," he says.

I nod. "Jealous?" I tease.

"Impressed," he says roughly. "I can feel the Light in you push me out." He grips my waist. It feels like cold handprints will remain when he pulls away. "But I have to ask," he starts then stops suddenly, watching my face very carefully.

I raise an eyebrow. "Well, if you must," I taunt. He hates it when I tease him, but a part of me loves to see the steam come from his ears and the irritation play across his features. I love when he loses control. It's both terrifying and exhilarating.

Even in the poor lighting of his room on the ship, I can see his face contort and turn a light shade of red. He breathes out and looks out the large window, watching the stars and the wide expanse of space, gathering his composure. "You enjoy taunting me," he says after a minute of silence.

I sit up on my elbows, desperately reaching for his lips. He leans down towards me, but stops short. I look into his eyes. They're cold and frigid like the rest of him. The Dark Side has taken its toll. The pull is strong. His walls are down, so I happily let myself slip into his thoughts. The turmoil is always there. But then there is a concrete certainty every time I invade his mind. Me. I'm always a constant at the forefront of his thoughts. I see myself through his eyes and almost grimace. My hair is everywhere, my breasts are swelling out of my bra, my chest is heaving from exerting so much energy on keeping him out my mind, but also from my obvious arousal. I thought I was being subtle, but unfortunately I can see the flush across my chest. Even the dim lighting shows how much I desire him. I never can keep my face straight. Sure, my mind may be off limits, but he can read my face like an open book.

"Rey?" I come back from searching his thoughts to see a slight look of irritation. "So I'm not allowed to see yours, but you can go through mine?" A slight guilt creeps up in my chest. It sits like a small pebble wedged in my heart. I know he dislikes when I flip through his thoughts around the Dark and Light. I know he hates how warm I feel against the parts of him that feel so cold.

"Well, maybe you should learn to shut me out." I see the look of surprise cross his features and smirk. "I can show you, if you'd like." I smile like a kid caught playing with a lightsaber and watch a flash of rage run through him.

Before I can giggle he is on me, capturing my mouth. "Now you have to let me in," he growls into my mouth. I feel an ache stir inside of me and the familiar itch of his cold mental hands pushing ever so slightly at my wall. I hold on while we kiss. I hold on while we roll onto our sides and he grabs my bottom and tugs me against me. The strain in his pants is perfectly lined up with where the ache is most strong. I even hold on as he lets his hand travel down the back of my pants, squeezing my butt as his tongue runs along my teeth. "Let me, Rey," he begs as he pulls away and pins me to the mattress again. He tugs at my pants.

My pants slip down my legs with ease. However, he is pulling them with a fury. I can feel the coolness melting off of him as a rage burns beneath his skin. He's desperate and I love it. He throws them over his shoulder with so much effort that they hit the door with a smack. "You'll have to try harder," I mutter as his face contorts. His rage is delicious. Instead of smashing the ship with his lightsaber, he is tugging and pulling at me, nearly bruising me with his lips. I can feel the butterflies in my stomach thaw and begin to swarm as he covers my body with his.

The push is almost too much as he presses his firm arousal against my center, only covered by a thin piece of fabric. I can feel it slip against my hair because I'm so aroused. I sigh as he kisses my neck and bites into it like an apple. I cry out as he furiously pushes my mind. It's like two strong hands are hitting my head over and over. But I love it. The sensation is so unusual, so overwhelming that I hold on even longer. I've never held on this long. Even as Ben runs his fingernails down my sides, leaving burning gouges in my skin, I still keep my wall firmly in place. It isn't even faltering. And I can feel his fury. His once cool skin is burning beneath my fingertips as I hold onto his strong shoulders. He pulls back and looks into my eyes. He looks completely shocked.

"How are you doing this?" He sounds amazed and immensely frustrated at the same time. I only smile, watching the way his mouth hangs slightly open in disbelief. He unclasps my bra with one hand and throws it into the window with the other. The clasp clinks against the thick glass. "Let me in," he murmurs as he takes my left nipple into his mouth. It's deliciously warm and wet. His tongue feels like it's on fire as he swirls it around and bites down. I bite my lip and moan. My wall stays standing. "Rey, please," he begs as he moves to my other breast.

I can feel the push, but I push back. I can sense that he is finding this less and less amusing, but that only makes it more enjoyable for me. I giggle as he holds me down while trailing kisses down my stomach. This will be my undoing, I just know it. But I hold on until my panties are gone and with no hesitation he is using his mouth on me in ways that make my toes curl and my hands to instinctively grip his hair. I never want him to leave the place between my legs. My wall is still up, but comes shattering down the second he plunges a finger into my core. I cry out and let him enter my mind and fill me. He groans into my center and the vibration makes me firmly press my mouth closed and moan behind closed lips. I can hardly sit still as his cool mental hands surround me. The Force vibrates around us as we let ourselves fall into each other.

I blink and he's standing next to the bed, naked. His pants are pooled at his feet. His face is unreadable, like it usually is when we're in each other's minds. The Force is pulsing as he climbs over top of me and holds me down with his eager hands. I can't even get a word in before he's inside of me and the sensation is both mental and physical. The Force is throbbing, my mind is swimming. I can feel him inside of me, but I can also feel his feelings. Ben is panting, his hips moving greedily, his worries forgotten. I can see myself at the forefront of his mind. I can see myself below him, the way my body shines, and the tightness he keeps moving in and out of. Every heartbeat is like one giant thrum in the air. I can see a light around his body, the way you would describe an aura. It's pulsing. He can see it around me too. The closer we get to the edge, the darker it becomes. And then suddenly, the sensation becomes confusing but amazing. I can feel the coldness of Ben and the warmth of myself as we burst at the seams. He pulls me up onto his lap, pulling me down onto him only three more times before I see flashes of light so brilliant that it feels like I need to shield my eyes even though they're closed. He cries out in my ear then sucks my neck while rocking me against him slower and slower until we come to rest.

I open my eyes and the first thing I see is Ben, but the first thing I feel is _us._ I feel a swirling energy around us, the gentle passage of our minds swimming into one another. He tickles my memories, I run my mental fingers along his. We smile and collapse onto the mattress, exhausted mentally and physically. I watch the ceiling but can see the way he saw me while we were connected. I can feel his fingertips tingling at the same time as I can feel my toes curling. We both turn and look at each other at the same time. I smile at him, he smiles back. The Force embraces us both and we feel like magnets. He pulls me into his side, our bodies intertwine and the only feeling I gather from myself and from Ben is peace. At this moment in time there is no Dark or Light, just a pure balance that feels like the perfect harmony.

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 **Thoughts? Reviews are fabulous!**


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